To my Anxiety

Why do you always tear at me,
like claws removing flesh?
Yet hide behind the guise of help
like you're putting "lies" to death?
We both know you're the liar,
the accuser and the fraud.
Falsifying honesty and truth
playing at god.
I've never heard a good thing from you,
you've only ever held me back;
put me down, picked me apart,
acquainted me with what I lack.
You question everything I do
until I'm feeling sick.
You keep me up, won't let me rest
till my heart's a hefty brick.
You take the fear I feel
and magnify it so immense
I swear I'll spiral down forever,
drown in horror so intense;
that when I finally get a chance to breathe
a clear moment in the storm -
I grasp at sudden clarity
before you're back to misinform.
I'm tired of this battle,
endless barrage of guilt and pain.
Quit stealing good things in my life
and flushing them down the drain.
I'm quite aware you'll never leave.
this is always how it's been.
But I'm getting better every day
at not letting you win.

- jainedoe